You Angered My Brother

October 2, 2012

Dear Pal,

This afternoon, I was really shocked when my brother blurted out words that are slimy as phlegm and are as fuschy as poop.  I hope you get what I mean.  I cannot type those words in here because my brother told me that from now on, you can’t post bad words or offensive pictures in the internet.  Wait. is it really true that you cannot do that anymore?  He also said that you can go to jail for expressing your opinions.  It kinda scared me.  Then, bro let me read this act called Cybercrime Law, which seemed like shit. Oops.  Sorry. What I mean is, very difficult to read and understand.  Anyway, that was really the first time my brother almost had a breakdown.  I never heard him curse like that.  Once my brother told me he’s a netizen. At first, I didn’t know the meaning of the word, but when I Googled it, I kinda get what he meant.  A netizen is a word…well, before I give the definition, I just wanna make it clear that this is my paraphrased version of the definition I got from  I am just so worried that I might be going to jail if I verbatimly quote the words from the site. A netizen is a person who interacts with people using the internet. True. bro’s life somehow revolves around what he calls his cyber turf. And with this Cybercrime Law he was talking about, I know, he’s awesomest cyber life is about to meet its demise.  So, you may ask, what the fuck is he fretting about?  Well, my bro is kinda bully type of guy.  One time, he got into a cyber fallout with a friend because bro corrected his Facebook post loaded with grammatical flaws.  I know it’s really not a big deal, but my brother is just so honest and opinionated that he could even make you swallow his come. In your face.  Wait, am I writing too figuratively?  Sorry, pal.  There are no other words left for me to say.  Have I ever mentioned vulgar words already? If I did, well, I hope you understand. I know you do.  Coz the people who so brilliantly thought about this law don’t. Right?

I just want to reveal the real reason why my brother fumes because of this law. He can’t watch porn anymore.  Or maybe he’s afraid that he might have his vacation to prisonlandia just because he made a mistake of biting the apple from the Garden of YouPorn. Or caught jerking off in front of his netbook while chatting to some bitches in LiveJasmin.  It’s so funny because I am the only one who catches him everytime he, you know, does his thing with his weiner.  We share the same room, all right?  Please don’t tell this to him.  Or else, he will sue me.  And we could both land in jail.

Honestly, I don’t really understand this Cybercrime Law thingy.  I checked my Facebook newsfeed and the clamor against it is just so overwhelming.  Some even had their profile pictures in black.  And some may just be joining the bandwagon and think that black is cool.  Or beautiful. Or whatever.  There are also memes that convey “resistance” to this law, attacking the politicians who support it.

As for my brother, well, I kinda know where he’s coming from.  Spending most of his time in front of his netbook. and even skipping his classes, I think, with the passing of this law, surely, my brother’s netizen life is about to end.  When he left the room earlier, he told me that it’s no longer fun in the Philippines.  he was contemplating to go to Venus.  I wasn’t sure if he’s talking about the club or the planet.  I started to have this fear for my brother.  I am afraid that if he suppresses himself from not visiting his fave pornsite, he’d probably go somewhere else and bang any girl and eventually acquire herpes, or worst, get infected with AIDS.  All I want is for my brother to have this choice, freedom to do what he wants using the internet, whether it does good or bad to him.  After all, it’s his choice, and no one must prevent him from doing that.  Pal, I might be giving you a picture of my brother as a perv, but you know, he’s a good brother.  He really is.  You just don’t provoke him.

No.  I am not really worried about this law.  My only concern is that, one senator might lift something from this blog and publicly tells people it’s his own.  But then again, it will never happen.  Because, uhm, I’m just a blogger.  I really don’t think I matter.

Love always,



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